I was talking to some Trainee Clinical Psychologists earlier today about self-care. I shared with them that I think about self-care in terms of ‘fluffy self-care’ and ‘fierce self-care’. They seemed to find this helpful so I thought I would write about it as it may be helpful for other people too.

There is a lot of information about self-care available. This tends to focus on things that help us to feel better and manage stress. People seem to think of things like getting a massage, lighting candles, or snuggling on the sofa with a blanket and a hot drink when we talk about self-care.

This is what I would call ‘fluffy self-care’. Things that help you feel better now.

What I call ‘fierce self-care’ is things that might not feel great at the time, but help you feel better in the long term. That might be things like making a difficult phone call, going to the doctor or dentist for a check-up, or organising a part of your home so you can find things more easily to help you feel less stressed. Things like standing up for yourself, or setting boundaries, can also be types of fierce self-care.

I view both types of self-care as important. They complement each other – we need a balance of fluffy self-care and fierce self-care. Sometimes you need something that helps you feel better now, and sometimes you need to do things that will help you feel better later.

As a reminder: self-care is different for everyone. It’s about finding what you need. What works for someone else might not work for you, and that’s ok!

Taryn
21st November 2024